Two years ago my closet was 60% black. I thought it was chic, easy, and always looked good. That was until I realized I was using it to HIDE.
When I first started my business (as an acupuncturist in 2012) I wanted to look “professional.” I felt like acupuncture might be something that other people might not take very seriously. I decided to invest in black blouses and dress pants. It was my self-imposed uniform. I would wear it and go to the clinic, even if I didn’t have any clients – and then I’d walk down to the cafe around the corner and work on my website for hours. For a while this made me feel good about myself. I scheduled meetings with other entrepreneurs, went to networking events, and tried to make myself as busy as possible so I wouldn’t feel the pain of not being myself. I even remember how rebellious I felt when I decided to transition from black dress pants to black yoga pants for my “uniform.” But the fact was, I was dressing up as someone else – someone else’s idea of what “successful” looked like – and it was draining my energy faster than I knew it.
It wasn’t until I was on a call with @sarahjenks, crying my eyes out because of how magical I had been shown I was in an ayahuasca ceremony (see the post with the dragon statue), and she asked me to go to my closet and tell her what I saw. I’d just been to Burning Man for the first time and still had some of my costumes sequestered to one side. Sarah immediately honed in on this. She told me to mix the costumes into my regular, “professional”, clothes. She even suggested that I might start actually wearing galactic leggings to my clinic!
I remember the first time I wore purple, sparkly, geometric leggings to the office, and how scary it felt. I was so sure someone was going to report me as a fraud, a quack, or a witch and I’d be burned at the stake (again) – seriously these were REAL fears!! But to my surprise – my clients LOVED them!! And they loved ME even more!
That began the conscious shifting of what I chose to keep in my closet – and my process of coming OUT of the magic closet. Slowly, I started to remove all of the black.
It was a long process (and I’m still honing it!), but over time I took ALL the black out of my closet. I was doing a lot of medicine work at the time, and mentoring with a shaman who also worked with sound healing. Every journey or meditation I went on always showed up in these shimmering opalescent colors (again see the dragon post). So then I started pulling out all the red, orange, and yellow from my closet. I’m a super immersive learner, and so I wanted to really dive deep into exploring these colors and really FEEEELING what it felt like to live in the world I saw in my visions (or as close as I could create it). — And it felt AMAZING! ???✨
When I first dyed my hair white & lavender, the cashiers at the grocery store would comment about how my hair matched my wallet – then they’d notice that I was dressed in some sort of variation of undulating opalescent hues! I’d just smile and say “These colors make me feel good!” ??
Over time the opalescence spread out into everything… office supplies, the color of my room, kitchen wares… you name it, and it was (and still is) shimmering, shiny, jewel tone hues from green to purple with lots of white and geometric patterns.
Now the point of this story is that THIS is my Energetic Signature. It’s how I can tell when I’m in my own field or when there’s other energy around me that’s not mine. It’s how I can tell when I need to clear my field, and keeps me centered and calm when there’s drama going on around me.
Surrounding yourself with your OWN energy is one of the most powerful acts of self love you can do – AND because it feels so good to be surrounded by your own energy, it decreases the likelihood of you wandering out of your body and a entangling with someone else unconsciously. It’s been one of the most empowering things I’ve done in my life.
What about you? Have you ever thought about the colors you choose to surround yourself with and why? What are you learning about yourself right now even just thinking about this subject?